Male body spray commercials remind me of late-night infomercials advertising male "enhancement" pills. The same theme is always prevalent: "Impressionable losers, buy our product and lots of girls will want to sleep with you." But recently there has been an arms race of sorts in the marketing of such products and the bar has consistently been raised. (If you don't know what I'm talking about see here.) Slogans for this product include: "Spray more, get more." and "So many ways to get some." Presumably, the effects can be so potent that users are advised to "Use Axe responsibly."
For the confident male such as myself, such advertising is pure entertainment. I mean, what man in his right mind would even consider purchasing a product like TAG, Bod Man, Axe, or RGX, when doing so would only highlight one's own inability to court members of the female population without the assistance of generic, Wal-Mart knock-off Abercrombie and Fitch cologne?
Next time you are shopping for deodorant or cologne, think to yourself, "WWJD?" No, not Jesus - although he's way too manly for body spray, as well - I'm taking about Bond. James Bond. He is the paradigmatic example of contemporary man: suave, mysterious, and above all, masculine. Coincidently, he's probably the only person in the world with a chance of beating Chuck Norris in hand-to-hand combat. And in between saving the world and rescuing various high society women of varying exotic locales from danger, the last thing he's worried about is whether or not his cologne is going to get him chicks. In other words, the only body spray he'd ever use is a can of aerosol Kevlar.
I have news for you, gentlemen. If a woman happens to see a can of TAG Body Spray (or one of its many nearly identical equivalents) in your medicine cabinet, do you think she is going to be convinced that you are any more of a real man, simply because you have fallen victim to the clever marketing of a product that preys on the sexual insecurities of pubescent teenagers? The answer is no. A woman with any class might as well be seeing the word "TOOL" emblazoned on the side of the can - because that's the only kind of person who would buy such crap in the first place.
The above work is the opinion of the author, and not necessarily that of the Prometheus Institute
